There are a lot of issues for parent to consider when they get divorced. The best interests of the children must be at the heart of making decisions about the issues the parents have to come to an agreement on. One of the things that many parents don’t pay much attention to during the divorce process is how future relationships will affect the children, but this is a very real concern that can significantly impact the children. For Chicago parents, considering how each parent will handle future relationships is something that should take place during the child custody phase of the divorce.
After a child’s parents divorce and begin to date other people, the children are likely to have a very strong opinion about any perspective stepparents they meet. Some parents choose not to listen to the children, but that might not be wise. The author of “The Complete Single Mother: Reassuring Answers to Your Most Challenging Concerns” claims that children are good at detecting deceitfulness.
She goes on to say that parents don’t necessarily need to pay attention to the little quirks children complain about when it comes to a person the parent is dating. The problem comes if the child says the person is sneaky or something similar. She warns parents to have a heart-to-heart talk with a child who takes issue with the person you are dating, so you can find out the real reason for the disdain. You may discover that the child has valid concerns that must be addressed.
One way that parents can help to ensure that the best interests of the child are taken seriously is to put conditions in a custody order that stipulate when the child can be exposed to people the parents date. Because of the seriousness of child custody orders, getting all conditions into the initial order is vital. Working with someone well versed in child custody can help you ensure you have a child custody order that puts your child first.
Source: Chicago Tribune, “You may be in love, but why aren’t your kids?” Nara Schoenberg, Jan. 07, 2014